commit c0a634cab5c147952ab5fab4cdaa81e7ca40480d
Author: michael <MichaelM2@0xfeedc0de.com>
Date:   Fri Aug 14 15:56:15 2026 -0400

    den.js 1.0.0 — he exists

diff --git a/.gitignore b/.gitignore
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--- /dev/null
+++ b/.gitignore
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+node_modules/
+package-lock.json
+
+# runtime data written by den.php (lives above docroot in deployment,
+# but ignore it here in case anyone tests with it alongside)
+*_presence.txt
+*_guestbook.txt
+*_poll.txt
+*_pilgrims.txt
+counter.txt
+status.txt
+
+.DS_Store
+*.swp
+*~
diff --git a/CHANGELOG.md b/CHANGELOG.md
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+++ b/CHANGELOG.md
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+# Changelog
+
+## 1.0.0
+
+First release. He exists.
+
+- Autonomous critter: chase / rest / wander / errand / mischief states, turn-rate
+  limited movement, stride-based paw prints that rotate to face travel direction
+- Burrow spawn animation, ten-minute idle sleep cycle with bed and circling ritual
+- Emote bubbles and speech; `denSay` / `denYip` helpers
+- `localStorage` memory: visits, lifetime pets, name. Pet milestones at 10/25/50/100,
+  behaviour changes with trust
+- Portable shell tab with critter commands
+- POI system via `data-den-poi`
+- Mischief system via `data-den-steal` — steals below 25 pets, gifts at and above
+- Event API: `celebrate`, `investigate`, `alarm`, `mischief`, `sleepy`, `zoomies`
+- Optional PHP presence endpoint with HMAC'd fingerprints and per-IP caps
+- Secret typed codes and the Konami code
+- Respects `prefers-reduced-motion`
diff --git a/LICENSE b/LICENSE
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--- /dev/null
+++ b/LICENSE
@@ -0,0 +1,21 @@
+MIT License
+
+Copyright (c) 2026 owo.ing
+
+Permission is hereby granted, free of charge, to any person obtaining a copy
+of this software and associated documentation files (the "Software"), to deal
+in the Software without restriction, including without limitation the rights
+to use, copy, modify, merge, publish, distribute, sublicense, and/or sell
+copies of the Software, and to permit persons to whom the Software is
+furnished to do so, subject to the following conditions:
+
+The above copyright notice and this permission notice shall be included in all
+copies or substantial portions of the Software.
+
+THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS IS", WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR
+IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY,
+FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NONINFRINGEMENT. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE
+AUTHORS OR COPYRIGHT HOLDERS BE LIABLE FOR ANY CLAIM, DAMAGES OR OTHER
+LIABILITY, WHETHER IN AN ACTION OF CONTRACT, TORT OR OTHERWISE, ARISING FROM,
+OUT OF OR IN CONNECTION WITH THE SOFTWARE OR THE USE OR OTHER DEALINGS IN THE
+SOFTWARE.
diff --git a/README.md b/README.md
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+++ b/README.md
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+# den.js
+
+An invisible kobold lives on your website.
+
+You never see him. You see his paw prints, his little dialogue, and — after ten
+minutes of quiet — the bed he drags out to sleep in. He walks to your cursor,
+gets bored and wanders off to sniff at things, remembers you between visits, and
+depending on how well he knows you he will either steal your buttons and run, or
+bring them to you as gifts.
+
+One script tag. No dependencies. No build step required.
+
+```html
+<script src="/den.js"></script>
+```
+
+That's it. That's the integration.
+
+---
+
+## What he does
+
+**Movement.** He has a position, a heading, and a turn rate, so he can't snap
+around instantly — chase him with your cursor and the prints carve an arc as he
+wheels to follow. He trots when you're close, sprints when you're far, and lays
+prints by distance travelled rather than on a timer, so his stride stays
+physically consistent at any framerate.
+
+**Moods.** `chase` when your cursor moves, `rest` when he arrives, `wander` when
+he gets bored, `errand` when he's been sent somewhere, `mischief` when he's
+committing a crime. Emote bubbles float off him — `❗` when he notices you,
+`👃` while sniffing, `💤` while dozing, hearts when he's fond of you.
+
+**Sleep.** Ten minutes with no input and he yawns, walks the tight circle every
+canid walks before lying down, and a bed fades in with a breathing lump under
+the blanket. Any keypress, click, scroll, or mouse twitch wakes him — groggily.
+
+**Memory.** Visit count, lifetime pets, and his name persist in `localStorage`.
+Return after a week and he says so. Pet him ten times and he decides you're
+friends; at twenty-five he starts lingering near your cursor instead of
+wandering off, and his stealing turns into gift-giving.
+
+**A shell.** A `>_ den` tab sits in the corner of every page. Open it and you can
+`come`, `sit`, `pet`, `fetch`, `sleep`, `where`, `status`, or `name` him.
+
+**Presence.** Optional. With `den.php` on the server he'll notice how many other
+people are on the site and mention that he can smell them.
+
+---
+
+## Install
+
+Copy `src/den.js` (or a build from `build/`) to your web root and add the script
+tag. Nothing else is required — he injects his own CSS and brings his own audio.
+
+For the presence counter, also copy `src/den.php` to your web root, change the
+secret at the top, and make sure PHP can write one file next to it:
+
+```sh
+touch ../owo_presence.txt
+chown www-data:www-data ../owo_presence.txt
+```
+
+The storage file lives one level *above* the document root so it can never be
+fetched over HTTP.
+
+---
+
+## Page integration
+
+Everything beyond the script tag is declarative markup.
+
+### Points of interest
+
+Mark anything you want him to visit and comment on. Pipe-separate alternate
+lines and he'll pick one at random:
+
+```html
+<div class="panel" data-den-poi="yip (sign it)|yip yip (write something)">
+```
+
+When he decides to wander, there's a 45% chance he heads for a POI that's
+currently on screen instead of a random point. He skips whichever one he visited
+last, so he explores rather than fixating.
+
+### Stealable things
+
+Nothing is stealable unless you say so:
+
+```html
+<span class="badge" data-den-steal>free gifs</span>
+```
+
+He self-limits to elements between 8–220px wide and 8–90px tall, and only ones
+currently visible. The original element is hidden and a fixed-position clone
+follows him, so the page layout doesn't reflow while he's got it. **Everything
+always comes back** — there are timeouts on every phase, and clicking him
+returns the item instantly.
+
+### Showing the presence count
+
+```html
+<span data-den-others></span>
+```
+
+Filled in on load and refreshed every 60 seconds.
+
+---
+
+## Events
+
+Pages tell him what happened; he decides how to feel about it.
+
+```js
+denEvent('celebrate',   { text: 'YIP!! (a new signature!!)' });
+denEvent('investigate', { el: '#guestbook', text: 'yip? (what is this)' });
+denEvent('investigate', { x: 400, y: 300, run: true });
+denEvent('alarm',       { text: 'YIP?! (INTRUDER)' });
+denEvent('mischief');
+denEvent('sleepy');
+denEvent('zoomies');
+```
+
+`celebrate` is a happy spin with a heart burst. `investigate` sends him on an
+errand — while on one he ignores your cursor, because he's busy. `alarm` startles
+him into a panicked sprint.
+
+Lower-level helpers, if you want to drive him directly:
+
+```js
+denSay('yip!!');        // speech bubble at his current position
+denYip();               // the synthesized squeak
+denSetName('crumb');    // returns the sanitized name, or null
+denGetName();
+denOthers;              // number, current presence count
+```
+
+### A worked example
+
+Redirect after a successful form post with a marker, then:
+
+```js
+const q = new URLSearchParams(location.search);
+if (q.get('signed') === '1') {
+  history.replaceState(null, '', location.pathname);
+  setTimeout(() => denEvent('celebrate', { text: 'YIP!! (for the hoard!!)' }), 3400);
+}
+```
+
+The delay lets him finish climbing out of his burrow first.
+
+---
+
+## Secret codes
+
+Typed anywhere outside a text field:
+
+| type | he says |
+| --- | --- |
+| `yip` | `yip!!` |
+| `owo` | `*notices u*` |
+| `uwu` | `yip (no)` |
+| `kobold` | `yip!! (that is me)` |
+| `shrine` | `YIP?! (how do u know about that)` |
+| `zoomies` | ten seconds of chaos |
+| `sleep` | bedtime |
+| ↑↑↓↓←→←→BA | same as `zoomies` |
+
+---
+
+## Building
+
+Optional — `src/den.js` runs fine as-is. Builds are for size and, if you want it,
+hiding the surprises above from anyone who opens view-source.
+
+```sh
+npm install -g terser javascript-obfuscator
+./build.fish
+```
+
+| file | size | notes |
+| --- | --- | --- |
+| `src/den.js` | 33 KB | readable source, the one you edit |
+| `build/den.min.js` | 20 KB | minified; recommended |
+| `build/den.obf.js` | 88 KB | string-encoded and control-flow flattened |
+
+The obfuscated build hides all his dialogue and secrets from casual reading, at
+4x the file size. Nothing stops a determined reader — this is spoiler protection,
+not security.
+
+`build.fish` also bumps the `?v=N` cache-buster in any `.php` file that
+references a build, because forgetting that will cost you an afternoon
+convincing yourself the code is broken when the browser is simply serving you
+last week's kobold.
+
+---
+
+## Testing
+
+`test/sim.js` runs him headless in jsdom with a mocked clock, so you can step
+through behaviour that would otherwise take ten minutes of sitting still:
+
+```sh
+npm install jsdom
+node test/sim.js                 # readable source
+node test/sim.js build/den.obf.js  # verify a build still works
+```
+
+It drives a full mischief cycle and asserts the stolen element is restored.
+
+---
+
+## Notes
+
+- Respects `prefers-reduced-motion` — under it he doesn't spawn at all, and the
+  API becomes no-ops so your page code never errors.
+- Everything is `position: fixed` with `pointer-events: none`, so he can't
+  intercept clicks or affect layout.
+- Petting ignores clicks on links, buttons, and form fields.
+- If `den.php` is missing, presence silently no-ops.
+- He injects `text-align: left` on his own UI, because inheritable properties
+  leak in from host pages. If something of his looks off on a new page, check
+  what the host's `body` is setting.
+
+---
+
+## License
+
+MIT — see [LICENSE](LICENSE).
+
+Built for [owo.ing](https://owo.ing). If you put him on your site, he's yours
+now. Name him something good.
diff --git a/build.fish b/build.fish
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--- /dev/null
+++ b/build.fish
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+#!/usr/bin/env fish
+# den.js build: minify, obfuscate, syntax-check, bump cache version.
+# needs: npm install -g terser javascript-obfuscator
+
+set -l src src/den.js
+set -l min build/den.min.js
+set -l obf build/den.obf.js
+set -l banner "/* den.js - an invisible kobold. (c) 2026 owo.ing. hands off the hoard. */"
+
+if not test -f $src
+    echo "no $src here. run this from the repo root."
+    exit 1
+end
+
+mkdir -p build
+
+echo ":: minifying"
+terser $src --compress passes=2 --mangle --format ascii_only=true -o $min
+or begin
+    echo "terser failed"
+    exit 1
+end
+
+echo ":: obfuscating"
+javascript-obfuscator $src --output $obf \
+    --compact true \
+    --self-defending true \
+    --string-array true --string-array-encoding base64 --string-array-threshold 0.9 \
+    --string-array-rotate true --string-array-shuffle true \
+    --control-flow-flattening true --control-flow-flattening-threshold 0.4 \
+    --dead-code-injection true --dead-code-injection-threshold 0.2 \
+    --unicode-escape-sequence false
+or begin
+    echo "obfuscator failed"
+    exit 1
+end
+
+echo ":: syntax check"
+node --check $min; and node --check $obf
+or begin
+    echo "SYNTAX CHECK FAILED - not touching your pages"
+    exit 1
+end
+
+# banner goes on after the tools run, or they'd strip it
+for f in $min $obf
+    set -l tmp (mktemp)
+    echo $banner > $tmp
+    cat $f >> $tmp
+    mv $tmp $f
+end
+
+# bump ?v=N wherever a build is referenced, so browsers actually refetch
+set -l bumped 0
+for f in *.php example/*.html example/*.php
+    test -f $f; or continue
+    set -l cur (grep -oP 'den\.(min|obf)\.js\?v=\K\d+' $f | head -1)
+    if test -n "$cur"
+        set -l new (math $cur + 1)
+        sed -i "s/\(den\.\(min\|obf\)\.js?v=\)$cur/\1$new/g" $f
+        echo "   $f: v$cur -> v$new"
+        set bumped (math $bumped + 1)
+    end
+end
+if test $bumped -eq 0
+    echo "   (no pages with ?v= found - remember to bust cache yourself)"
+end
+
+echo ":: done"
+ls -la $src $min $obf | awk '{printf "   %8s  %s\n", $5, $9}'
diff --git a/build/den.min.js b/build/den.min.js
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--- /dev/null
+++ b/build/den.min.js
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+/* den.js - the owo.ing kobold. (c) 2026 owo.ing. hands off the hoard. */
+!function(){if(!window.__denCritter){window.__denCritter=!0;var e=document.createElement("style");e.textContent='.paw-trail{position:fixed;pointer-events:none;z-index:9999;animation:pawfade 1s linear forwards;filter:drop-shadow(0 0 3px currentColor);}@keyframes pawfade{0%{opacity:.9;transform:scale(1);}100%{opacity:0;transform:scale(.5) translateY(10px);}}.emote{position:fixed;pointer-events:none;z-index:9999;font-size:15px;animation:emoterise 1.2s ease-out forwards;}.emote.say{font-size:12px;font-weight:bold;color:#c9b8ff;text-shadow:0 0 6px #8f7bff,1px 1px 0 #120a20;white-space:nowrap;font-family:"Comic Sans MS","Comic Sans",cursive;}@keyframes emoterise{0%{opacity:0;transform:translateY(0) scale(.6);}15%{opacity:1;}100%{opacity:0;transform:translateY(-34px) scale(1.15);}}.denbed{position:fixed;z-index:9998;pointer-events:none;animation:bedin .6s ease-out;transition:opacity .45s ease;}@keyframes bedin{from{opacity:0;transform:translateY(10px);}to{opacity:1;transform:translateY(0);}}.denbed .lump{animation:breathe 2.8s ease-in-out infinite;transform-origin:38px 24px;}@keyframes breathe{0%,100%{transform:scaleY(1);}50%{transform:scaleY(1.17);}}body.denzoom *,body.denzoom *::before,body.denzoom *::after{animation-duration:.22s !important;}.denhole{position:fixed;z-index:9997;pointer-events:none;transition:opacity .55s ease;animation:holein .5s ease-out;}@keyframes holein{from{opacity:0;transform:scale(.6);}to{opacity:1;transform:scale(1);}}.dentab{position:fixed;right:14px;bottom:0;text-align:left;z-index:10000;background:#1b1229;color:#8f7bff;border:2px ridge #6b5a8a;border-bottom:none;border-radius:8px 8px 0 0;font-family:"Courier New",monospace;font-size:11px;padding:3px 10px;cursor:pointer;opacity:.55;transition:opacity .2s;user-select:none;}.dentab:hover{opacity:1;}.denterm{position:fixed;right:8px;bottom:0;z-index:10000;width:300px;max-width:86vw;background:#0d0818;border:3px ridge #6b5a8a;border-bottom:none;border-radius:10px 10px 0 0;font-family:"Courier New",monospace;font-size:12px;padding:8px;display:none;text-align:left;}.denterm.open{display:block;}.denterm .dout{height:170px;overflow-y:auto;white-space:pre-wrap;word-break:break-word;color:#c9b8ff;}.denterm .dline{display:flex;gap:6px;margin-top:5px;align-items:center;}.denterm .dprompt{color:#ff6ec7;white-space:nowrap;}.denterm input{flex:1;background:transparent;border:none;outline:none;color:#a8ffe0;font-family:inherit;font-size:12px;}',document.head.appendChild(e);var t=null;if(window.denYip=Q,window.matchMedia&&window.matchMedia("(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)").matches)window.denSay=function(){};else{var n,i,a=["#8f7bff","#4fc3ff"],o=Math.floor(4*Math.random());0===o?(n=70,i=80+Math.random()*Math.max(window.innerHeight-160,1)):1===o?(n=window.innerWidth-70,i=80+Math.random()*Math.max(window.innerHeight-160,1)):2===o?(n=80+Math.random()*Math.max(window.innerWidth-160,1),i=70):(n=80+Math.random()*Math.max(window.innerWidth-160,1),i=window.innerHeight-70);var r={x:n,y:i},s=Math.random()*Math.PI*2,l={x:r.x,y:r.y},d="rest",c=performance.now()+800,h=0,m=performance.now()+99999,p=0,f=1,u=0,y=performance.now(),w=performance.now(),x=0,v=0,g=0,M=!1,b=null,k=0,T=1,C=null,A=null,I=null,S=null,z=!1,L=0,q=null,E=0,P=null,Y=null,N=null,H={v:0,pets:0,name:null,last:0,id:null};try{var R=JSON.parse(localStorage.getItem("denmem"));R&&"object"==typeof R&&(H.v=0|R.v,H.pets=0|R.pets,H.name="string"==typeof R.name&&R.name?R.name.slice(0,16):null,H.last=R.last||0,"string"==typeof R.id&&/^[a-f0-9]{16}$/.test(R.id)&&(H.id=R.id))}catch(e){}var B=H.last;if(H.v++,H.last=Date.now(),!H.id){var F="";try{var W=new Uint8Array(8);crypto.getRandomValues(W);for(var O=0;O<8;O++)F+=("0"+W[O].toString(16)).slice(-2)}catch(e){for(var _=0;_<16;_++)F+=Math.floor(16*Math.random()).toString(16)}H.id=F}Z(),window.denSetName=function(e){return(e=String(e||"").replace(/[^\w \-]/g,"").trim().slice(0,16))?(H.name=e,Z(),ie("yip!! (i am "+e+")"),te("\ud83d\udc96",!0),N&&(N.textContent=$()),e):null},window.denGetName=function(){return H.name},window.denSay=ie,document.addEventListener("keydown",ae),document.addEventListener("scroll",ae,{passive:!0}),document.addEventListener("touchstart",ae,{passive:!0}),document.addEventListener("mousemove",function(e){if(l.x=e.clientX,l.y=e.clientY,ae(),"errand"!==d&&"mischief"!==d){var t=performance.now();t<h||t<v||("chase"!==d&&te("\u2757"),d="chase")}}),document.addEventListener("click",function(e){ae(),e.target.closest&&e.target.closest("a,button,input,textarea,label,select")||Math.hypot(e.clientX-r.x,e.clientY-r.y)>48||oe()}),window.denEvent=function(e,t){t=t||{};var n=performance.now();if(w=n,M&&ae(),"mischief"===d&&"mischief"!==e&&re(),"mischief"!==e)if("celebrate"===e)h=n+1100,d="rest",c=n+2800,m=n+99999,te("\u2728",!0),setTimeout(function(){te("\ud83d\udc95",!0)},300),setTimeout(function(){te("\u2728",!0)},650),setTimeout(function(){ie(t.text||"YIP!!")},180),Q();else if("investigate"===e){var i=function(e){var t=e.el;if("string"==typeof t&&(t=document.querySelector(t)),t&&t.getBoundingClientRect){var n=t.getBoundingClientRect();if(n.width>0)return le(n.left+.5*n.width,n.top+Math.min(.4*n.height,50))}return"number"==typeof e.x&&"number"==typeof e.y?le(e.x,e.y):null}(t);if(!i)return;I=i,S=t.text||null,z=!!t.run,L=n+9e3,d="errand"}else if("alarm"===e){te("\u26a0\ufe0f",!0),ie(t.text||"YIP?!");var a=Math.random()*Math.PI*2;I=le(r.x+260*Math.cos(a),r.y+260*Math.sin(a)),S=null,z=!0,L=n+4e3,d="errand"}else"sleepy"===e?(g=n+800,x=n+1400,ie("*yawn*")):"zoomies"===e?de():t.text&&ie(t.text);else se(!0)};var D=["ArrowUp","ArrowUp","ArrowDown","ArrowDown","ArrowLeft","ArrowRight","ArrowLeft","ArrowRight","b","a"],U=0;document.addEventListener("keydown",function(e){var t=1===e.key.length?e.key.toLowerCase():e.key;(U=t===D[U]?U+1:t===D[0]?1:0)===D.length&&(U=0,de())});var V="";document.addEventListener("keydown",function(e){var t=e.target;t&&("INPUT"===t.tagName||"TEXTAREA"===t.tagName||t.isContentEditable)||1===e.key.length&&("yip"===(V=(V+e.key.toLowerCase()).slice(-12)).slice(-3)?(ie("yip!!"),V=""):"owo"===V.slice(-3)?(ie("*notices u*"),V=""):"uwu"===V.slice(-3)?(ie("yip (no)"),V=""):"kobold"===V.slice(-6)?(te("\ud83d\udc95",!0),ie("yip!! (that is me)"),V=""):"shrine"===V.slice(-6)?(ie("YIP?! 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diff --git a/build/den.obf.js b/build/den.obf.js
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..a2f00e7
--- /dev/null
+++ b/build/den.obf.js
@@ -0,0 +1,2 @@
+/* den.js - the owo.ing kobold. (c) 2026 owo.ing. hands off the hoard. */
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diff --git a/example/index.html b/example/index.html
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..da63f40
--- /dev/null
+++ b/example/index.html
@@ -0,0 +1,126 @@
+<!DOCTYPE html>
+<html lang="en">
+<head>
+<meta charset="utf-8">
+<meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1">
+<title>den.js — there is a kobold on this page</title>
+<style>
+  :root{
+    --bg1:#2a1e3d; --bg2:#3d2a55; --panel:#241a36; --panel2:#2f2145;
+    --pink:#ffb3de; --mint:#a8ffe0; --lav:#c9b8ff; --hot:#ff6ec7;
+    --ink:#f2e9ff; --dim:#9d8bc4;
+  }
+  *{box-sizing:border-box;}
+  body{
+    margin:0; padding:24px 16px 80px;
+    color:var(--ink);
+    font-family:"Comic Sans MS","Comic Sans","Segoe UI",sans-serif;
+    background:
+      radial-gradient(1.5px 1.5px at 30px 40px,#ffffffcc,transparent),
+      radial-gradient(1px 1px at 120px 90px,#ffb3decc,transparent),
+      radial-gradient(2px 2px at 200px 30px,#a8ffe0aa,transparent),
+      linear-gradient(160deg,var(--bg1),var(--bg2) 60%,#1e1530);
+    background-size:260px 200px,260px 200px,260px 200px,cover;
+    background-attachment:fixed;
+  }
+  .wrap{max-width:720px;margin:0 auto;}
+  h1{
+    font-size:clamp(34px,8vw,58px); margin:0; text-align:center;
+    background:linear-gradient(90deg,var(--pink),var(--mint),var(--lav),var(--pink));
+    -webkit-background-clip:text; background-clip:text; color:transparent;
+    filter:drop-shadow(3px 3px 0 #00000088);
+  }
+  .sub{text-align:center;color:var(--dim);font-size:13px;margin:6px 0 20px;}
+  .panel{
+    border:3px ridge var(--lav); border-radius:12px;
+    background:var(--panel); padding:14px 16px; margin-bottom:12px;
+  }
+  .panel.alt{background:var(--panel2);}
+  h2{font-size:16px;margin:0 0 8px;color:var(--mint);border-bottom:2px dashed var(--pink);padding-bottom:4px;}
+  h2::before{content:"🐾 ";}
+  p{font-size:14px;line-height:1.5;margin:6px 0;}
+  code{background:#1b1229;color:var(--mint);padding:1px 5px;border-radius:4px;font-size:12px;}
+  pre{background:#0d0818;border:2px inset #6b5a8a;border-radius:8px;padding:10px;overflow-x:auto;}
+  pre code{background:none;padding:0;}
+  .loot{display:flex;flex-wrap:wrap;gap:6px;justify-content:center;margin-top:8px;}
+  .badge{
+    width:88px;height:31px;display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center;
+    font-size:9px;font-weight:bold;text-align:center;font-family:Verdana,Arial,sans-serif;
+    border:1px solid #fff;line-height:1.1;
+  }
+  .b1{background:#000;color:#0f0;} .b2{background:linear-gradient(#37276b,#1e1443);color:var(--mint);}
+  .b3{background:#fff3a8;color:#1e1530;} .b4{background:linear-gradient(90deg,var(--hot),var(--mint));color:#1e1530;}
+  button{
+    font-family:inherit;font-size:13px;font-weight:bold;color:#1e1530;
+    background:linear-gradient(180deg,var(--pink),var(--hot));
+    border:3px outset #ffd6ef;border-radius:10px;padding:5px 12px;cursor:pointer;margin:3px;
+  }
+  button:active{border-style:inset;}
+  kbd{background:#1b1229;border:1px solid #6b5a8a;border-radius:4px;padding:1px 5px;font-size:11px;}
+  .hint{font-size:12px;color:var(--dim);}
+</style>
+</head>
+<body>
+<div class="wrap">
+
+  <h1>den.js</h1>
+  <p class="sub">there is a kobold on this page. you cannot see him. move your mouse.</p>
+
+  <div class="panel" data-den-poi="yip (this is the part about me)|yip!!">
+    <h2>hello</h2>
+    <p>He is invisible. What you can see is his paw prints, his little comments,
+    and — if you leave him alone long enough — the bed he drags out.</p>
+    <p class="hint">Give him a moment to climb out of his burrow.</p>
+  </div>
+
+  <div class="panel alt" data-den-poi="yip? (are they talking about me)">
+    <h2>try this</h2>
+    <p><b>Move your cursor</b> — he comes to it. Stop, and he waits, then gets bored and wanders off.</p>
+    <p><b>Click him</b> — where the prints are, not where your cursor is. He yips and spins. Do it ten times and he decides you're friends.</p>
+    <p><b>Type <code>yip</code></b> — anywhere on the page. He answers.</p>
+    <p><b>Open the <code>&gt;_ den</code> tab</b> in the corner, then try <code>come</code>, <code>fetch</code>, <code>status</code>, or <code>name crumb</code>.</p>
+    <p><b>Press</b> <kbd>↑</kbd><kbd>↑</kbd><kbd>↓</kbd><kbd>↓</kbd><kbd>←</kbd><kbd>→</kbd><kbd>←</kbd><kbd>→</kbd><kbd>B</kbd><kbd>A</kbd> — or just type <code>zoomies</code>.</p>
+    <p><b>Wait ten minutes</b> without touching anything. He goes to bed.</p>
+  </div>
+
+  <div class="panel" data-den-poi="yip (mine)|yip!! (do not touch)">
+    <h2>things he can steal</h2>
+    <p>These are marked <code>data-den-steal</code>. Nothing is stealable unless
+    you say so. Hit <code>fetch</code> in the shell to make him take one now —
+    he always brings it back.</p>
+    <div class="loot">
+      <span class="badge b1" data-den-steal>NOTEPAD.EXE</span>
+      <span class="badge b2" data-den-steal>apache 4 life</span>
+      <span class="badge b3" data-den-steal>Y2K COMPLIANT</span>
+      <span class="badge b4" data-den-steal>free gifs</span>
+    </div>
+  </div>
+
+  <div class="panel alt" data-den-poi="yip? (what does this one do)">
+    <h2>events</h2>
+    <p>Pages tell him what happened; he decides how to feel about it.</p>
+    <p style="text-align:center;">
+      <button onclick="denEvent('celebrate',{text:'YIP!! (something good happened)'})">celebrate</button>
+      <button onclick="denEvent('investigate',{el:'#thing',text:'yip? (what is this)'})">investigate</button>
+      <button onclick="denEvent('alarm',{text:'YIP?! (INTRUDER)'})">alarm</button>
+      <button onclick="denEvent('mischief')">mischief</button>
+      <button onclick="denEvent('sleepy')">sleepy</button>
+    </p>
+    <p id="thing" class="hint" style="text-align:center;">↑ "investigate" sends him to this line, specifically.</p>
+  </div>
+
+  <div class="panel">
+    <h2>the whole integration</h2>
+<pre><code>&lt;script src="/den.js"&gt;&lt;/script&gt;</code></pre>
+    <p>Optional markup:</p>
+<pre><code>&lt;div data-den-poi="yip (sign it)"&gt;      &lt;!-- he visits and comments --&gt;
+&lt;span data-den-steal&gt;             &lt;!-- he may take this --&gt;
+&lt;span data-den-others&gt;&lt;/span&gt;     &lt;!-- how many others are here --&gt;</code></pre>
+  </div>
+
+  <p class="sub">MIT licensed. if you put him on your site, he's yours now.</p>
+</div>
+
+<script src="../src/den.js"></script>
+</body>
+</html>
diff --git a/package.json b/package.json
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..6b326f7
--- /dev/null
+++ b/package.json
@@ -0,0 +1,17 @@
+{
+  "name": "den.js",
+  "version": "1.0.0",
+  "description": "An invisible kobold lives on your website.",
+  "main": "src/den.js",
+  "files": ["src/", "build/", "README.md", "LICENSE"],
+  "scripts": {
+    "test": "node test/sim.js",
+    "test:min": "node test/sim.js build/den.min.js",
+    "test:obf": "node test/sim.js build/den.obf.js"
+  },
+  "keywords": ["cursor", "mascot", "kobold", "indieweb", "neocities", "vanilla-js"],
+  "license": "MIT",
+  "devDependencies": {
+    "jsdom": "^24.0.0"
+  }
+}
diff --git a/src/den.js b/src/den.js
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..781dd7e
--- /dev/null
+++ b/src/den.js
@@ -0,0 +1,873 @@
+(function(){
+  if (window.__denCritter) return;
+  window.__denCritter = true;
+
+  var st = document.createElement('style');
+  st.textContent =
+    '.paw-trail{position:fixed;pointer-events:none;z-index:9999;animation:pawfade 1s linear forwards;filter:drop-shadow(0 0 3px currentColor);}' +
+    '@keyframes pawfade{0%{opacity:.9;transform:scale(1);}100%{opacity:0;transform:scale(.5) translateY(10px);}}' +
+    '.emote{position:fixed;pointer-events:none;z-index:9999;font-size:15px;animation:emoterise 1.2s ease-out forwards;}' +
+    '.emote.say{font-size:12px;font-weight:bold;color:#c9b8ff;text-shadow:0 0 6px #8f7bff,1px 1px 0 #120a20;white-space:nowrap;font-family:"Comic Sans MS","Comic Sans",cursive;}' +
+    '@keyframes emoterise{0%{opacity:0;transform:translateY(0) scale(.6);}15%{opacity:1;}100%{opacity:0;transform:translateY(-34px) scale(1.15);}}' +
+    '.denbed{position:fixed;z-index:9998;pointer-events:none;animation:bedin .6s ease-out;transition:opacity .45s ease;}' +
+    '@keyframes bedin{from{opacity:0;transform:translateY(10px);}to{opacity:1;transform:translateY(0);}}' +
+    '.denbed .lump{animation:breathe 2.8s ease-in-out infinite;transform-origin:38px 24px;}' +
+    '@keyframes breathe{0%,100%{transform:scaleY(1);}50%{transform:scaleY(1.17);}}' +
+    'body.denzoom *,body.denzoom *::before,body.denzoom *::after{animation-duration:.22s !important;}' +
+    '.denhole{position:fixed;z-index:9997;pointer-events:none;transition:opacity .55s ease;animation:holein .5s ease-out;}' +
+    '@keyframes holein{from{opacity:0;transform:scale(.6);}to{opacity:1;transform:scale(1);}}' +
+    '.dentab{position:fixed;right:14px;bottom:0;text-align:left;z-index:10000;background:#1b1229;color:#8f7bff;border:2px ridge #6b5a8a;border-bottom:none;border-radius:8px 8px 0 0;font-family:"Courier New",monospace;font-size:11px;padding:3px 10px;cursor:pointer;opacity:.55;transition:opacity .2s;user-select:none;}' +
+    '.dentab:hover{opacity:1;}' +
+    '.denterm{position:fixed;right:8px;bottom:0;z-index:10000;width:300px;max-width:86vw;background:#0d0818;border:3px ridge #6b5a8a;border-bottom:none;border-radius:10px 10px 0 0;font-family:"Courier New",monospace;font-size:12px;padding:8px;display:none;text-align:left;}' +
+    '.denterm.open{display:block;}' +
+    '.denterm .dout{height:170px;overflow-y:auto;white-space:pre-wrap;word-break:break-word;color:#c9b8ff;}' +
+    '.denterm .dline{display:flex;gap:6px;margin-top:5px;align-items:center;}' +
+    '.denterm .dprompt{color:#ff6ec7;white-space:nowrap;}' +
+    '.denterm input{flex:1;background:transparent;border:none;outline:none;color:#a8ffe0;font-family:inherit;font-size:12px;}';
+  document.head.appendChild(st);
+
+  var actx = null;
+  function yipSound(){
+    try {
+      if (!actx) actx = new (window.AudioContext || window.webkitAudioContext)();
+      if (actx.state === 'suspended') actx.resume();
+      var o = actx.createOscillator(), g = actx.createGain();
+      var t = actx.currentTime;
+      o.type = 'sine';
+      o.frequency.setValueAtTime(700 + Math.random() * 200, t);
+      o.frequency.exponentialRampToValueAtTime(1400 + Math.random() * 300, t + 0.07);
+      o.frequency.exponentialRampToValueAtTime(600, t + 0.14);
+      g.gain.setValueAtTime(0.12, t);
+      g.gain.exponentialRampToValueAtTime(0.001, t + 0.16);
+      o.connect(g); g.connect(actx.destination);
+      o.start(t); o.stop(t + 0.18);
+    } catch(e){}
+  }
+  window.denYip = yipSound;
+
+  if (window.matchMedia && window.matchMedia('(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)').matches) {
+    window.denSay = function(){};
+    return;
+  }
+
+  var PAW = '<svg width="14" height="15" viewBox="0 0 20 21" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg">' +
+    '<ellipse cx="10" cy="14.5" rx="5.2" ry="4.6"/>' +
+    '<ellipse cx="3.2" cy="8.6" rx="2.1" ry="2.7"/>' +
+    '<ellipse cx="7.6" cy="5.4" rx="2.1" ry="2.8"/>' +
+    '<ellipse cx="12.4" cy="5.4" rx="2.1" ry="2.8"/>' +
+    '<ellipse cx="16.8" cy="8.6" rx="2.1" ry="2.7"/>' +
+    '</svg>';
+  var colors = ['#8f7bff', '#4fc3ff'];
+  var spawnEdge = Math.floor(Math.random() * 4);
+  var sx, sy;
+  if (spawnEdge === 0) { sx = 70; sy = 80 + Math.random() * Math.max(window.innerHeight - 160, 1); }
+  else if (spawnEdge === 1) { sx = window.innerWidth - 70; sy = 80 + Math.random() * Math.max(window.innerHeight - 160, 1); }
+  else if (spawnEdge === 2) { sx = 80 + Math.random() * Math.max(window.innerWidth - 160, 1); sy = 70; }
+  else { sx = 80 + Math.random() * Math.max(window.innerWidth - 160, 1); sy = window.innerHeight - 70; }
+  var pos = { x: sx, y: sy };
+  var heading = Math.random() * Math.PI * 2;
+  var target = { x: pos.x, y: pos.y };
+  var mode = 'rest';
+  var restUntil = performance.now() + 800;
+  var petUntil = 0;
+  var nextZzz = performance.now() + 99999;
+  var lastEmote = 0;
+  var side = 1, distSince = 0;
+  var lastT = performance.now();
+  var WALK = 70, TROT = 150, RUN = 340;
+  var STRIDE_WALK = 24, STRIDE_RUN = 38;
+  var TURN = 4.0;
+  var SLEEPY_AFTER = 600000;
+  var lastActivity = performance.now();
+  var sleepPrepUntil = 0, wakeUntil = 0, suppressBumpUntil = 0;
+  var asleep = false, bedEl = null, nextSleepZ = 0;
+  var speedMult = 1;
+  var poiSay = null, lastPoi = null;
+  var errandTarget = null, errandSay = null, errandRun = false, errandDeadline = 0;
+  var mis = null, lastMischief = 0;
+  var dout = null, dinp = null, dpr = null;
+
+  var mem = { v: 0, pets: 0, name: null, last: 0, id: null };
+  try {
+    var m0 = JSON.parse(localStorage.getItem('denmem'));
+    if (m0 && typeof m0 === 'object') {
+      mem.v = m0.v | 0;
+      mem.pets = m0.pets | 0;
+      mem.name = (typeof m0.name === 'string' && m0.name) ? m0.name.slice(0, 16) : null;
+      mem.last = m0.last || 0;
+      if (typeof m0.id === 'string' && /^[a-f0-9]{16}$/.test(m0.id)) mem.id = m0.id;
+    }
+  } catch(e){}
+  var prevLast = mem.last;
+  mem.v++;
+  mem.last = Date.now();
+  if (!mem.id) {
+    var idb = '';
+    try {
+      var ida = new Uint8Array(8);
+      crypto.getRandomValues(ida);
+      for (var ii = 0; ii < 8; ii++) idb += ('0' + ida[ii].toString(16)).slice(-2);
+    } catch(e) {
+      for (var ij = 0; ij < 16; ij++) idb += Math.floor(Math.random() * 16).toString(16);
+    }
+    mem.id = idb;
+  }
+  function saveMem(){
+    try { localStorage.setItem('denmem', JSON.stringify(mem)); } catch(e){}
+  }
+  saveMem();
+
+  function greeting(){
+    var away = prevLast ? (Date.now() - prevLast) : 0;
+    if (mem.v <= 1) return '*yip* (hello)';
+    if (away > 604800000) return 'YIP!! (where were u)';
+    if (mem.name) return '*yip* (' + mem.name + ' missed u)';
+    if (mem.v >= 8) return 'yip (welcome home)';
+    return 'yip!! (u came back)';
+  }
+
+  window.denSetName = function(n){
+    n = String(n || '').replace(/[^\w \-]/g, '').trim().slice(0, 16);
+    if (!n) return null;
+    mem.name = n;
+    saveMem();
+    sayText('yip!! (i am ' + n + ')');
+    emote('\uD83D\uDC96', true);
+    if (dpr) dpr.textContent = promptTxt();
+    return n;
+  };
+  window.denGetName = function(){ return mem.name; };
+
+  function promptTxt(){ return (mem.name || 'guest') + '@den ~>'; }
+
+  function denPhrase(n){
+    if (n <= 0) return 'just u + the kobold rn';
+    if (n === 1) return '1 other is here rn';
+    return n + ' others are here rn';
+  }
+  function checkPresence(){
+    if (!window.fetch) return;
+    fetch('/den.php?id=' + mem.id, { cache: 'no-store' }).then(function(r){
+      if (!r.ok) return null;
+      return r.json();
+    }).then(function(j){
+      if (!j) return;
+      var n = j.others | 0;
+      window.denOthers = n;
+      var els = document.querySelectorAll('[data-den-others]');
+      for (var i = 0; i < els.length; i++) els[i].textContent = denPhrase(n);
+    }).catch(function(){});
+  }
+
+  function pois(){
+    var out = [];
+    var els = document.querySelectorAll('[data-den-poi]');
+    for (var i = 0; i < els.length; i++) {
+      var r = els[i].getBoundingClientRect();
+      if (r.width < 10 || r.height < 10) continue;
+      if (r.bottom < 40 || r.top > window.innerHeight - 40) continue;
+      if (r.right < 40 || r.left > window.innerWidth - 40) continue;
+      out.push({ el: els[i], r: r });
+    }
+    return out;
+  }
+
+  function emote(ch, force){
+    var now = performance.now();
+    if (!force && now - lastEmote < 500) return;
+    lastEmote = now;
+    var el = document.createElement('span');
+    el.className = 'emote';
+    el.textContent = ch;
+    el.style.left = (pos.x + (Math.random() * 16 - 8)) + 'px';
+    el.style.top  = (pos.y - 18) + 'px';
+    document.body.appendChild(el);
+    setTimeout(function(){ el.remove(); }, 1250);
+  }
+
+  function pick(arr){ return arr[Math.floor(Math.random() * arr.length)]; }
+
+  function sayText(t){
+    var el = document.createElement('span');
+    el.className = 'emote say';
+    el.textContent = t;
+    el.style.left = (pos.x - 10) + 'px';
+    el.style.top  = (pos.y - 22) + 'px';
+    document.body.appendChild(el);
+    setTimeout(function(){ el.remove(); }, 1250);
+  }
+  window.denSay = sayText;
+
+  function makeBed(){
+    bedEl = document.createElement('div');
+    bedEl.className = 'denbed';
+    bedEl.innerHTML = '<svg width="64" height="42" viewBox="0 0 64 42" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg">' +
+      '<rect x="2" y="24" width="60" height="11" rx="5" fill="#3d2a55" stroke="#8f7bff" stroke-width="2"/>' +
+      '<rect x="3" y="33" width="4" height="8" rx="1" fill="#8f7bff"/>' +
+      '<rect x="57" y="33" width="4" height="8" rx="1" fill="#8f7bff"/>' +
+      '<ellipse cx="13" cy="22" rx="9" ry="5" fill="#c9b8ff"/>' +
+      '<path class="lump" d="M23 26 Q33 10 53 23 L53 26 Z" fill="#4fc3ff" stroke="#8f7bff" stroke-width="1.5"/>' +
+      '</svg>';
+    bedEl.style.left = (pos.x - 32) + 'px';
+    bedEl.style.top  = (pos.y - 26) + 'px';
+    document.body.appendChild(bedEl);
+  }
+
+  function bump(){
+    var now = performance.now();
+    if (now < suppressBumpUntil) return;
+    lastActivity = now;
+    if (sleepPrepUntil) sleepPrepUntil = 0;
+    if (asleep) {
+      asleep = false;
+      if (bedEl) {
+        var b = bedEl; bedEl = null;
+        b.style.opacity = '0';
+        setTimeout(function(){ b.remove(); }, 500);
+      }
+      emote('\u2728', true);
+      sayText('...yip?');
+      wakeUntil = now + 900;
+    }
+  }
+  document.addEventListener('keydown', bump);
+  document.addEventListener('scroll', bump, { passive: true });
+  document.addEventListener('touchstart', bump, { passive: true });
+
+  document.addEventListener('mousemove', function(e){
+    target.x = e.clientX; target.y = e.clientY;
+    bump();
+    if (mode === 'errand' || mode === 'mischief') return;
+    var now = performance.now();
+    if (now < petUntil || now < wakeUntil) return;
+    if (mode !== 'chase') emote('\u2757');
+    mode = 'chase';
+  });
+
+  function petHim(){
+    var now = performance.now();
+    if (mode === 'mischief') returnItem();
+    petUntil = now + 800;
+    mode = 'rest';
+    restUntil = now + 2000;
+    nextZzz = now + 99999;
+    emote(pick(['\uD83D\uDC95','\uD83D\uDC96','\uD83D\uDC97']), true);
+    setTimeout(function(){ emote('\uD83D\uDC95', true); }, 240);
+    yipSound();
+    mem.pets++;
+    saveMem();
+    if (mem.pets === 10) setTimeout(function(){ sayText('yip!! (we are friends now)'); }, 420);
+    else if (mem.pets === 25) setTimeout(function(){ sayText('yip (best friend)'); }, 420);
+    else if (mem.pets === 50) setTimeout(function(){ sayText('yip!! (bonded 4 life)'); }, 420);
+    else if (mem.pets === 100) setTimeout(function(){ sayText('yip (soulmates)'); }, 420);
+  }
+
+  document.addEventListener('click', function(e){
+    bump();
+    if (e.target.closest && e.target.closest('a,button,input,textarea,label,select')) return;
+    if (Math.hypot(e.clientX - pos.x, e.clientY - pos.y) > 48) return;
+    petHim();
+  });
+
+  function stealables(){
+    var out = [];
+    var els = document.querySelectorAll('[data-den-steal]');
+    for (var i = 0; i < els.length; i++) {
+      var r = els[i].getBoundingClientRect();
+      if (r.width < 8 || r.width > 220 || r.height < 8 || r.height > 90) continue;
+      if (r.bottom < 40 || r.top > window.innerHeight - 60) continue;
+      if (r.right < 40 || r.left > window.innerWidth - 60) continue;
+      if (els[i].style.visibility === 'hidden') continue;
+      out.push(els[i]);
+    }
+    return out;
+  }
+
+  function returnItem(){
+    if (mis && mis.clone) {
+      mis.el.style.visibility = '';
+      mis.clone.remove();
+    }
+    if (mis) {
+      mis = null;
+      mode = 'wander';
+      target = pickWander();
+    }
+  }
+
+  function startMischief(force){
+    var now = performance.now();
+    if (mis) return false;
+    if (!force && now - lastMischief < 150000) return false;
+    var cands = stealables();
+    if (!cands.length) return false;
+    if (!force && Math.random() > 0.07) return false;
+    var el = cands[Math.floor(Math.random() * cands.length)];
+    var r = el.getBoundingClientRect();
+    mis = {
+      el: el,
+      phase: 'togo',
+      pt: clampPt(r.left + r.width / 2, r.top + r.height / 2),
+      deadline: now + 18000,
+      gift: mem.pets >= 25
+    };
+    lastMischief = now;
+    mode = 'mischief';
+    return true;
+  }
+
+  function grabItem(now){
+    var r = mis.el.getBoundingClientRect();
+    mis.clone = document.createElement('div');
+    mis.clone.style.cssText = 'position:fixed;z-index:9998;pointer-events:none;margin:0;left:' + r.left + 'px;top:' + r.top + 'px;width:' + r.width + 'px;height:' + r.height + 'px;';
+    var inner = mis.el.cloneNode(true);
+    inner.style.margin = '0';
+    mis.clone.appendChild(inner);
+    document.body.appendChild(mis.clone);
+    mis.el.style.visibility = 'hidden';
+    mis.cw = r.width / 2;
+    mis.ch = r.height;
+    if (mis.gift) {
+      sayText('yip!');
+    } else {
+      var aa = Math.random() * Math.PI * 2;
+      mis.dropPt = clampPt(pos.x + Math.cos(aa) * 300, pos.y + Math.sin(aa) * 300);
+      sayText(pick(['yip yip yip (mine now)', '(catch me)', 'yip!! (tax)']));
+    }
+    mis.phase = 'carry';
+  }
+
+  function clampPt(x, y){
+    return {
+      x: Math.min(Math.max(x, 20), window.innerWidth - 20),
+      y: Math.min(Math.max(y, 20), window.innerHeight - 20)
+    };
+  }
+
+  function resolvePoint(opts){
+    var el = opts.el;
+    if (typeof el === 'string') el = document.querySelector(el);
+    if (el && el.getBoundingClientRect) {
+      var r = el.getBoundingClientRect();
+      if (r.width > 0) return clampPt(r.left + r.width * 0.5, r.top + Math.min(r.height * 0.4, 50));
+    }
+    if (typeof opts.x === 'number' && typeof opts.y === 'number') return clampPt(opts.x, opts.y);
+    return null;
+  }
+
+  window.denEvent = function(type, opts){
+    opts = opts || {};
+    var now = performance.now();
+    lastActivity = now;
+    if (asleep) bump();
+    if (mode === 'mischief' && type !== 'mischief') returnItem();
+    if (type === 'mischief') {
+      startMischief(true);
+      return;
+    }
+    if (type === 'celebrate') {
+      petUntil = now + 1100;
+      mode = 'rest';
+      restUntil = now + 2800;
+      nextZzz = now + 99999;
+      emote('\u2728', true);
+      setTimeout(function(){ emote('\uD83D\uDC95', true); }, 300);
+      setTimeout(function(){ emote('\u2728', true); }, 650);
+      setTimeout(function(){ sayText(opts.text || 'YIP!!'); }, 180);
+      yipSound();
+    } else if (type === 'investigate') {
+      var pt = resolvePoint(opts);
+      if (!pt) return;
+      errandTarget = pt;
+      errandSay = opts.text || null;
+      errandRun = !!opts.run;
+      errandDeadline = now + 9000;
+      mode = 'errand';
+    } else if (type === 'alarm') {
+      emote('\u26A0\uFE0F', true);
+      sayText(opts.text || 'YIP?!');
+      var aa = Math.random() * Math.PI * 2;
+      errandTarget = clampPt(pos.x + Math.cos(aa) * 260, pos.y + Math.sin(aa) * 260);
+      errandSay = null;
+      errandRun = true;
+      errandDeadline = now + 4000;
+      mode = 'errand';
+    } else if (type === 'sleepy') {
+      suppressBumpUntil = now + 800;
+      sleepPrepUntil = now + 1400;
+      sayText('*yawn*');
+    } else if (type === 'zoomies') {
+      zoomies();
+    } else if (opts.text) {
+      sayText(opts.text);
+    }
+  };
+
+  function zoomies(){
+    document.body.classList.add('denzoom');
+    speedMult = 7.5;
+    var old = document.title;
+    document.title = 'YIP YIP YIP YIP YIP';
+    sayText('YIP YIP YIP YIP');
+    setTimeout(function(){
+      document.body.classList.remove('denzoom');
+      speedMult = 1;
+      document.title = old;
+    }, 10000);
+  }
+
+  var kseq = ['ArrowUp','ArrowUp','ArrowDown','ArrowDown','ArrowLeft','ArrowRight','ArrowLeft','ArrowRight','b','a'];
+  var kpos = 0;
+  document.addEventListener('keydown', function(e){
+    var k = e.key.length === 1 ? e.key.toLowerCase() : e.key;
+    kpos = (k === kseq[kpos]) ? kpos + 1 : (k === kseq[0] ? 1 : 0);
+    if (kpos !== kseq.length) return;
+    kpos = 0;
+    zoomies();
+  });
+
+  var buf = '';
+  document.addEventListener('keydown', function(e){
+    var t = e.target;
+    if (t && (t.tagName === 'INPUT' || t.tagName === 'TEXTAREA' || t.isContentEditable)) return;
+    if (e.key.length !== 1) return;
+    buf = (buf + e.key.toLowerCase()).slice(-12);
+    if (buf.slice(-3) === 'yip') { sayText('yip!!'); buf = ''; }
+    else if (buf.slice(-3) === 'owo') { sayText('*notices u*'); buf = ''; }
+    else if (buf.slice(-3) === 'uwu') { sayText('yip (no)'); buf = ''; }
+    else if (buf.slice(-6) === 'kobold') { emote('\uD83D\uDC95', true); sayText('yip!! (that is me)'); buf = ''; }
+    else if (buf.slice(-6) === 'shrine') { sayText('YIP?! (how do u know about that)'); buf = ''; }
+    else if (buf.slice(-7) === 'zoomies') { zoomies(); buf = ''; }
+    else if (buf.slice(-5) === 'sleep') {
+      suppressBumpUntil = performance.now() + 800;
+      sleepPrepUntil = performance.now() + 1400;
+      sayText('*yawn*');
+      buf = '';
+    }
+  });
+
+  function angDiff(a, b){
+    var d = (b - a) % (Math.PI * 2);
+    if (d >  Math.PI) d -= Math.PI * 2;
+    if (d < -Math.PI) d += Math.PI * 2;
+    return d;
+  }
+
+  function pickWander(){
+    poiSay = null;
+    if (Math.random() < 0.45) {
+      var ps = pois().filter(function(p){ return p.el !== lastPoi; });
+      if (ps.length) {
+        var p = ps[Math.floor(Math.random() * ps.length)];
+        lastPoi = p.el;
+        var txts = (p.el.getAttribute('data-den-poi') || '').split('|').filter(Boolean);
+        if (txts.length) poiSay = txts[Math.floor(Math.random() * txts.length)];
+        return {
+          x: Math.min(Math.max(p.r.left + p.r.width * (0.25 + Math.random() * 0.5), 20), window.innerWidth - 20),
+          y: Math.min(Math.max(p.r.top + Math.min(p.r.height * 0.4, 60) + Math.random() * 20, 20), window.innerHeight - 20)
+        };
+      }
+    }
+    var r = 60 + Math.random() * 120;
+    var a = heading + (Math.random() - 0.5) * 2.6;
+    return {
+      x: Math.min(Math.max(pos.x + Math.cos(a) * r, 20), window.innerWidth  - 20),
+      y: Math.min(Math.max(pos.y + Math.sin(a) * r, 20), window.innerHeight - 20)
+    };
+  }
+
+  function drop(){
+    side = -side;
+    var p = document.createElement('span');
+    p.className = 'paw-trail';
+    p.innerHTML = PAW;
+    var c = colors[side > 0 ? 0 : 1];
+    p.querySelector('svg').style.fill = c;
+    p.style.color = c;
+    var deg = heading * 180 / Math.PI + 90;
+    var ox = -Math.sin(heading) * 7 * side;
+    var oy =  Math.cos(heading) * 7 * side;
+    p.style.left = (pos.x + ox - 7) + 'px';
+    p.style.top  = (pos.y + oy - 7) + 'px';
+    p.querySelector('svg').style.transform = 'rotate(' + deg + 'deg) scaleX(' + side + ')';
+    p.querySelector('svg').style.display = 'block';
+    document.body.appendChild(p);
+    setTimeout(function(){ p.remove(); }, 1300);
+  }
+
+  function tick(now){
+    var dt = Math.min((now - lastT) / 1000, 0.05);
+    lastT = now;
+    var zoom = speedMult;
+
+    if (asleep) {
+      if (now > nextSleepZ) { emote('\uD83D\uDCA4', true); nextSleepZ = now + 2600; }
+      requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+      return;
+    }
+    if (sleepPrepUntil) {
+      if (now < sleepPrepUntil) {
+        heading += 7 * dt;
+        var bs = WALK * 0.7 * dt;
+        pos.x += Math.cos(heading) * bs;
+        pos.y += Math.sin(heading) * bs;
+        distSince += bs;
+        if (distSince >= STRIDE_WALK * 0.8) { distSince = 0; drop(); }
+      } else {
+        sleepPrepUntil = 0;
+        asleep = true;
+        pos.x = Math.min(Math.max(pos.x, 44), window.innerWidth - 44);
+        pos.y = Math.min(Math.max(pos.y, 40), window.innerHeight - 30);
+        makeBed();
+        sayText('...zzz');
+        nextSleepZ = now + 1800;
+      }
+      requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+      return;
+    }
+    if (now - lastActivity > SLEEPY_AFTER && now > petUntil) {
+      sleepPrepUntil = now + 1400;
+      sayText('*yawn*');
+      requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+      return;
+    }
+    if (now < wakeUntil) {
+      requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+      return;
+    }
+
+    if (now < petUntil) {
+      heading += 9 * dt;
+      var st2 = WALK * 0.9 * zoom * dt;
+      pos.x += Math.cos(heading) * st2;
+      pos.y += Math.sin(heading) * st2;
+      distSince += st2;
+      if (distSince >= STRIDE_WALK * 0.8) { distSince = 0; drop(); }
+      requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+      return;
+    }
+
+    if (mode === 'mischief') {
+      if (!mis) {
+        mode = 'wander';
+        target = pickWander();
+        requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+        return;
+      }
+      if (now > mis.deadline) {
+        if (mis.phase === 'carry') {
+          mis.phase = 'dropped';
+          mis.dropTime = now;
+          mis.deadline = now + 12000;
+          sayText(mis.gift ? '*wheeze* (u are fast. here)' : '*wheeze* (fine)');
+        } else {
+          returnItem();
+          requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+          return;
+        }
+      }
+      if (mis.phase === 'togo' || mis.phase === 'carry') {
+        var mdest;
+        if (mis.phase === 'togo') mdest = mis.pt;
+        else mdest = mis.gift ? clampPt(target.x, target.y) : mis.dropPt;
+        var mx = mdest.x - pos.x, my = mdest.y - pos.y;
+        var md = Math.hypot(mx, my);
+        if (md < 16) {
+          if (mis.phase === 'togo') {
+            grabItem(now);
+          } else {
+            mis.phase = 'dropped';
+            mis.dropTime = now;
+            if (mis.gift) {
+              sayText(pick(['uwu (for u)', 'yip (i brought u this)', '(i love u)']));
+              emote('\uD83D\uDC95', true);
+              setTimeout(function(){ emote('\uD83D\uDC96', true); }, 300);
+            } else {
+              sayText(pick(['yip (u can have it back)', '(hehe)', 'yip yip (a good crime)']));
+            }
+          }
+        } else {
+          var mw = Math.atan2(my, mx);
+          var mmx = TURN * dt * 2.2;
+          heading += Math.max(-mmx, Math.min(mmx, angDiff(heading, mw)));
+          var msp = (mis.phase === 'carry' && !mis.gift ? RUN : TROT) * zoom;
+          var mst = (mis.phase === 'carry' && !mis.gift ? STRIDE_RUN : STRIDE_WALK);
+          var mstep = Math.min(msp * dt, md);
+          pos.x += Math.cos(heading) * mstep;
+          pos.y += Math.sin(heading) * mstep;
+          distSince += mstep;
+          if (distSince >= mst) { distSince = 0; drop(); }
+        }
+        if (mis && mis.clone && mis.phase === 'carry') {
+          mis.clone.style.left = (pos.x - mis.cw) + 'px';
+          mis.clone.style.top  = (pos.y - mis.ch - 14) + 'px';
+        }
+      } else if (mis.phase === 'dropped') {
+        if (now > mis.dropTime + (mis.gift ? 4200 : 5200)) {
+          var hr = mis.el.getBoundingClientRect();
+          mis.clone.style.transition = 'left .6s ease, top .6s ease, opacity .6s ease';
+          mis.clone.style.left = hr.left + 'px';
+          mis.clone.style.top  = hr.top + 'px';
+          mis.phase = 'returning';
+          mis.retTime = now;
+          if (!mis.gift) sayText('yip (fine. take it back)');
+        }
+      } else if (mis.phase === 'returning') {
+        if (now > mis.retTime + 700) {
+          emote('\u2728', true);
+          returnItem();
+        }
+      }
+      requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+      return;
+    }
+
+    if (mode === 'errand') {
+      if (!errandTarget || now > errandDeadline) {
+        errandTarget = null;
+        mode = 'wander';
+        target = pickWander();
+      } else {
+        var ex = errandTarget.x - pos.x, ey = errandTarget.y - pos.y;
+        var ed = Math.hypot(ex, ey);
+        if (ed < 16) {
+          if (errandSay) sayText(errandSay);
+          else emote(pick(['\uD83D\uDC43','\u2753']));
+          errandTarget = null;
+          errandSay = null;
+          mode = 'rest';
+          restUntil = now + 1500;
+          nextZzz = now + 99999;
+        } else {
+          var ew = Math.atan2(ey, ex);
+          var emx = TURN * dt * 2.2;
+          heading += Math.max(-emx, Math.min(emx, angDiff(heading, ew)));
+          var esp = (errandRun ? RUN : TROT) * zoom;
+          var est = (errandRun ? STRIDE_RUN : STRIDE_WALK);
+          var estep = Math.min(esp * dt, ed);
+          pos.x += Math.cos(heading) * estep;
+          pos.y += Math.sin(heading) * estep;
+          distSince += estep;
+          if (distSince >= est) { distSince = 0; drop(); }
+        }
+      }
+      requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+      return;
+    }
+
+    var dx = target.x - pos.x, dy = target.y - pos.y;
+    var dist = Math.hypot(dx, dy);
+
+    if (mode === 'chase') {
+      if (dist < 26) {
+        mode = 'rest';
+        restUntil = now + (mem.pets >= 25 ? 4200 : 2500);
+        nextZzz = now + 1700;
+        if (Math.random() < 0.5) emote(mem.pets >= 10 ? '\uD83D\uDC95' : '\u2728');
+      }
+    } else if (mode === 'rest') {
+      if (now > nextZzz) { emote('\uD83D\uDCA4'); nextZzz = now + 1600; }
+      if (now > restUntil) {
+        if (!startMischief(false)) { target = pickWander(); mode = 'wander'; }
+      }
+    } else {
+      if (dist < 14) {
+        mode = 'rest'; nextZzz = now + 99999;
+        if (poiSay) {
+          restUntil = now + 1200 + Math.random() * 1600;
+          sayText(poiSay);
+          poiSay = null;
+        } else {
+          restUntil = now + 600 + Math.random() * 1600;
+          emote(pick(['\uD83D\uDC43','\u2753','\uD83C\uDF38','\u2728','\uD83D\uDC3E']));
+        }
+      }
+    }
+
+    if (mode !== 'rest' && dist > 1) {
+      var want = Math.atan2(dy, dx);
+      var maxTurn = TURN * dt * (mode === 'chase' ? 2.2 : 1);
+      heading += Math.max(-maxTurn, Math.min(maxTurn, angDiff(heading, want)));
+      var running = (mode === 'chase' && dist > 160);
+      var speed = (mode === 'chase' ? (running ? RUN : TROT) : WALK) * zoom;
+      var stride = running ? STRIDE_RUN : STRIDE_WALK;
+      var step = Math.min(speed * dt, dist);
+      pos.x += Math.cos(heading) * step;
+      pos.y += Math.sin(heading) * step;
+      distSince += step;
+      if (distSince >= stride) { distSince = 0; drop(); }
+    }
+    requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+  }
+  var tab = document.createElement('div');
+  tab.className = 'dentab';
+  tab.textContent = '>_ den';
+  var term = document.createElement('div');
+  term.className = 'denterm';
+  term.innerHTML = '<div class="dout">den shell v2 (now portable)\ntype "help"\n</div>' +
+    '<div class="dline"><span class="dprompt"></span><input autocomplete="off" spellcheck="false" aria-label="den shell input"></div>';
+
+  function dprint(t){ dout.textContent += t + '\n'; dout.scrollTop = dout.scrollHeight; }
+  function openTerm(){ term.classList.add('open'); tab.style.display = 'none'; dinp.focus(); }
+  function closeTerm(){ term.classList.remove('open'); tab.style.display = ''; }
+
+  var petSeen = 0;
+  function runCmd(raw){
+    var lc = raw.toLowerCase();
+    if (lc.indexOf('name ') === 0) {
+      var nn = window.denSetName(raw.slice(5));
+      dprint(nn ? 'the kobold accepts the name "' + nn + '". this is legally binding' : 'that name did not survive processing. try letters');
+      return;
+    }
+    if (lc === 'name') {
+      dprint(mem.name ? 'the kobold is named "' + mem.name + '"' : 'the kobold has no name yet. try: name <something>');
+      return;
+    }
+    if (lc.indexOf('sudo') === 0) { dprint('no.'); return; }
+    if (lc.indexOf('rm ') === 0 || lc === 'rm') { dprint('rm: the hoard is load-bearing. request denied'); return; }
+    switch (lc) {
+      case 'help':
+        dprint('commands: pet, come, sit, fetch, sleep, wake, zoomies, where, status, name <x>, ls, whoami, pwd, neofetch, yip, clear, exit');
+        break;
+      case 'pet':
+      case 'pet kobold':
+        petSeen++;
+        petHim();
+        dprint(petSeen >= 5 ? '*yip yip yip* (maximum happiness. further pets stored for later)' : '*pets dispensed remotely* yip!');
+        break;
+      case 'fetch': {
+        if (startMischief(true)) {
+          dprint(mem.pets >= 25 ? 'he goes to find u something' : 'oh no');
+        } else {
+          dprint(mis ? 'his paws are full' : 'nothing here worth taking. sad');
+        }
+        break;
+      }
+      case 'come': {
+        var r = term.getBoundingClientRect();
+        target = {
+          x: Math.min(Math.max(r.left + 40, 20), window.innerWidth - 20),
+          y: Math.min(Math.max(r.top - 40, 20), window.innerHeight - 20)
+        };
+        if (asleep) bump();
+        mode = 'chase';
+        dprint('he is on his way');
+        break;
+      }
+      case 'sit':
+        mode = 'rest';
+        restUntil = performance.now() + 6000;
+        nextZzz = performance.now() + 99999;
+        sayText('yip (sitting)');
+        dprint('he sits. a good boy');
+        break;
+      case 'sleep':
+        suppressBumpUntil = performance.now() + 800;
+        sleepPrepUntil = performance.now() + 1400;
+        sayText('*yawn*');
+        dprint('bedtime initiated');
+        break;
+      case 'wake':
+        if (asleep) { bump(); dprint('he stirs'); }
+        else dprint('he is already awake and probably watching u');
+        break;
+      case 'zoomies':
+        zoomies();
+        dprint('oh no');
+        break;
+      case 'where':
+        sayText('yip!! (here)');
+        emote('\u2728', true);
+        dprint('listen for the yip');
+        break;
+      case 'status':
+        dprint('mode: ' + (asleep ? 'asleep' : mode) + ' | pets: ' + mem.pets + ' | name: ' + (mem.name || '(unnamed)') + ' | visits: ' + mem.v);
+        break;
+      case 'ls':
+        dprint('den/  hoard/  guestbook.txt  do_not_open/  retopo_FINAL_v2/');
+        break;
+      case 'whoami':
+        dprint('a guest in the den');
+        break;
+      case 'pwd':
+        dprint('/home/den/u');
+        break;
+      case 'yip':
+        sayText('yip!!');
+        dprint('yip!!');
+        break;
+      case 'neofetch':
+        dprint('      /\\_/\\     guest@den\n     ( o.o )    ----------\n      > ^ <     OS: DenOS (yes it is just apache)\n   kobold btw   Shell: den shell 2.0\n                Uptime: emotionally? unclear');
+        break;
+      case 'clear':
+        dout.textContent = '';
+        break;
+      case 'exit':
+        dprint('u can check out any time u like...');
+        setTimeout(closeTerm, 600);
+        break;
+      default:
+        dprint("fish: Unknown command: '" + raw.split(' ')[0].replace(/[^\w.-]/g, '') + "'");
+    }
+  }
+
+  function mountShell(){
+    document.body.appendChild(tab);
+    document.body.appendChild(term);
+    dout = term.querySelector('.dout');
+    dinp = term.querySelector('input');
+    dpr  = term.querySelector('.dprompt');
+    dpr.textContent = promptTxt();
+    tab.addEventListener('click', openTerm);
+    dinp.addEventListener('keydown', function(e){
+      if (e.key === 'Escape') { closeTerm(); return; }
+      if (e.key !== 'Enter') return;
+      var raw = dinp.value.trim();
+      dinp.value = '';
+      if (!raw) return;
+      dprint(promptTxt() + ' ' + raw);
+      runCmd(raw);
+    });
+  }
+
+  var hole = document.createElement('div');
+  hole.className = 'denhole';
+  hole.innerHTML = '<svg width="56" height="34" viewBox="0 0 56 34" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg">' +
+    '<ellipse cx="28" cy="17" rx="26" ry="14" fill="#0d0818" stroke="#8f7bff" stroke-width="2.5"/>' +
+    '<ellipse cx="28" cy="19" rx="18" ry="8" fill="#000"/>' +
+    '<ellipse cx="20" cy="10" rx="4" ry="1.6" fill="#3d2a55"/>' +
+    '</svg>';
+  hole.style.left = (pos.x - 28) + 'px';
+  hole.style.top  = (pos.y - 17) + 'px';
+  function beginLife(){
+    mountShell();
+    checkPresence();
+    setInterval(checkPresence, 60000);
+    document.body.appendChild(hole);
+    setTimeout(function(){
+      emote('\u2728', true);
+      sayText(greeting());
+      var cx = window.innerWidth / 2, cy = window.innerHeight / 2;
+      var ang = Math.atan2(cy - pos.y, cx - pos.x);
+      heading = ang;
+      var r2 = 160 + Math.random() * 120;
+      target = {
+        x: Math.min(Math.max(pos.x + Math.cos(ang) * r2, 20), window.innerWidth - 20),
+        y: Math.min(Math.max(pos.y + Math.sin(ang) * r2, 20), window.innerHeight - 20)
+      };
+      poiSay = null;
+      mode = 'wander';
+    }, 700);
+    setTimeout(function(){
+      hole.style.opacity = '0';
+      setTimeout(function(){ hole.remove(); }, 600);
+    }, 2600);
+    setTimeout(function(){
+      var n = window.denOthers | 0;
+      if (n > 0) sayText('yip (' + n + (n === 1 ? ' other is' : ' others are') + ' here... i can smell them)');
+    }, 9000);
+  }
+  if (document.body) beginLife();
+  else document.addEventListener('DOMContentLoaded', beginLife);
+  requestAnimationFrame(tick);
+})();
diff --git a/src/den.php b/src/den.php
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..53d12e2
--- /dev/null
+++ b/src/den.php
@@ -0,0 +1,52 @@
+<?php
+// presence endpoint for den.js
+// counts client ids (js-running visitors), capped per ip to prevent inflation
+// stores hmac'd fingerprints only, never raw ips or ids. entries expire after 5 min
+// one line per active visitor: latest_timestamp|fingerprint|iphash
+// change this secret, keep it private
+define('DEN_SECRET', 'NowmIO4VXYYF6cmg6hJRw3P4ZEd4PIpylnmpKhj8QeW9fe7wfJ94lwTGw8PfwRgRB2MlZEqaIBftH9L3twsccucwq6gFKnmqLpXsTS0PqN1Glwi6tRYtH3hPKm0VD3U');
+
+$f = __DIR__ . '/../owo_presence.txt';
+$now = time();
+$iph = substr(hash_hmac('sha1', $_SERVER['REMOTE_ADDR'], DEN_SECRET), 0, 12);
+
+$id = isset($_GET['id']) ? $_GET['id'] : '';
+if (preg_match('/^[a-f0-9]{16}$/', $id)) {
+    $me = substr(hash_hmac('sha1', 'id:' . $id, DEN_SECRET), 0, 12);
+} else {
+    $me = $iph;
+}
+
+$roster = [];
+if (file_exists($f)) {
+    foreach (file($f, FILE_IGNORE_NEW_LINES | FILE_SKIP_EMPTY_LINES) as $l) {
+        $p = explode('|', $l, 3);
+        if (count($p) < 2) continue;
+        $ts = (int)$p[0];
+        if ($ts < $now - 300) continue;
+        $fp = $p[1];
+        $rih = isset($p[2]) ? $p[2] : '';
+        if (!isset($roster[$fp]) || $ts > $roster[$fp][0]) {
+            $roster[$fp] = [$ts, $rih];
+        }
+    }
+}
+
+$from_my_ip = 0;
+foreach ($roster as $fp => $e) {
+    if ($e[1] === $iph && $fp !== $me) $from_my_ip++;
+}
+if (isset($roster[$me]) || $from_my_ip < 3) {
+    $roster[$me] = [$now, $iph];
+}
+$others = count($roster) - (isset($roster[$me]) ? 1 : 0);
+
+$out = '';
+foreach ($roster as $fp => $e) {
+    $out .= $e[0] . '|' . $fp . '|' . $e[1] . "\n";
+}
+@file_put_contents($f, $out, LOCK_EX);
+
+header('Content-Type: application/json');
+header('Cache-Control: no-store');
+echo json_encode(['others' => $others]);
diff --git a/test/sim.js b/test/sim.js
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..f3d87a1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/test/sim.js
@@ -0,0 +1,82 @@
+const { JSDOM } = require('jsdom');
+const fs = require('fs');
+
+const dom = new JSDOM(`<!DOCTYPE html><html><head></head><body>
+<span id="loot">LOOT</span>
+</body></html>`, { runScripts: 'outside-only', pretendToBeVisual: false });
+const w = dom.window;
+const doc = w.document;
+
+// viewport
+Object.defineProperty(w, 'innerWidth', { value: 1200 });
+Object.defineProperty(w, 'innerHeight', { value: 800 });
+
+// clock + rAF pump
+let NOW = 0;
+let rafQ = [];
+w.performance.now = () => NOW;
+w.requestAnimationFrame = (cb) => { rafQ.push(cb); return rafQ.length; };
+function pump(ms, step = 16) {
+  const end = NOW + ms;
+  while (NOW < end) {
+    NOW += step;
+    // run any pending timeouts jsdom scheduled? jsdom timers use real time.
+    const q = rafQ; rafQ = [];
+    q.forEach(cb => cb(NOW));
+  }
+}
+
+// matchMedia
+w.matchMedia = () => ({ matches: false });
+
+// loot element rect
+const loot = doc.getElementById('loot');
+loot.setAttribute('data-den-steal', '');
+loot.getBoundingClientRect = () => ({ left: 300, top: 300, right: 400, bottom: 330, width: 100, height: 30 });
+
+// generic rects so pois()/terminal don't explode
+const origGBCR = w.Element.prototype.getBoundingClientRect;
+w.Element.prototype.getBoundingClientRect = function(){
+  if (this === loot) return loot.getBoundingClientRect();
+  return { left: 0, top: 0, right: 0, bottom: 0, width: 0, height: 0 };
+};
+
+// run den.js
+const src = fs.readFileSync(process.argv[2] || 'src/den.js', 'utf8');
+w.eval(src);
+
+// jsdom setTimeout is real-time; the spawn sequence uses setTimeout(700/2600).
+// We can't fast-forward those, but they don't gate mischief. Wait them out for real.
+function log(label){
+  const clone = [...doc.querySelectorAll('div')].find(d => (d.getAttribute('style')||'').includes('pointer-events:none') && d.textContent.includes('LOOT'));
+  const says = [...doc.querySelectorAll('.emote.say')].map(e => e.textContent);
+  console.log(`[t=${NOW}ms] ${label} | loot.visibility='${loot.style.visibility}' | clone=${clone ? 'YES@'+clone.style.left+','+clone.style.top : 'no'} | says=${JSON.stringify(says)}`);
+}
+
+setTimeout(() => {
+  pump(4000);            // past spawn
+  log('before mischief');
+  w.denEvent('mischief');
+  log('event fired');
+  pump(100);  log('after 100ms');
+  pump(1000); log('after ~1.1s (should be walking to loot)');
+  pump(2000); log('after ~3.1s (grabbed? carrying?)');
+
+  // simulate the user moving the mouse mid-carry
+  const ev = new w.MouseEvent('mousemove', { clientX: 900, clientY: 200 });
+  doc.dispatchEvent(ev);
+  log('mouse moved');
+  pump(3000); log('after ~6.1s');
+  pump(6000); log('after ~12.1s (dropped by now?)');
+  pump(8000); log('after ~20.1s (returned by now?)');
+  pump(10000); log('after ~30.1s (MUST be returned)');
+
+  const restored = loot.style.visibility !== 'hidden';
+  const noOrphan = ![...doc.querySelectorAll('div')]
+    .some(d => (d.getAttribute('style') || '').includes('pointer-events:none')
+            && d.textContent.includes('LOOT'));
+  console.log('');
+  console.log(restored ? 'PASS: stolen element restored' : 'FAIL: element still hidden');
+  console.log(noOrphan ? 'PASS: no orphaned clone left behind' : 'FAIL: clone leaked');
+  process.exit(restored && noOrphan ? 0 : 1);
+}, 3500);